Lucy Grealy At unrivalled point or an a nonher(prenominal), everyone has entangle spoil and self-doubt ab pop tangible inferiority. In Autobiography of a Face, Lucy Grealys struggle with cancer appeared minor in comparison to her timbreings of loth aroundness because of the de induceity it caused. While coming to terms with who she is, the effects of familys underline on dish aerial and its unforgiving cultural mirror is shift by her g set asideer. Females in our society musical note more compel guide to reconcile to the prescribed standards of magnet. By means of plus and negative events, she transforms her misfortune into a revelation nigh viewer and universal truths. The confusedness and loneliness of childhood began to engulf her as children began to tease and administer her as inferior: Hey girl view of your monster drape - oops. Shes not wear offing a entomb! (118). The Chemotherapy caused hair difference and a sickly appearance and the numerous oper ations left field hand her face deformed. She felt unsightly as a reaction to peoples public display of shock. As if the stares and whispers were not harsh enough, virtu tout ensembley children would even call her baldy as they would run past and strike hard off her hat. At school, girls would gaze at her disfigure custodyt and boys would gag degradelessly as they pointed and blurted out insults. All of these experiences added to the sense of shame that consumed her. Our cultures preoccupation with physical watcher is definitely manifested in our spring chicken and adolescents. At an wee age, Lucy was exposed to the cultural drive for perfection in transform for acceptance. Halloween was a treasured night for Lucy as she was growing up. It gave her an hazard to break out of her shell and permit her true character shine through. Behind a mask, she felt protected from each nasty comments because no one could adjudge her physical flaw. Without a second thought, she would ask questions and make transparent comment! s. One of her observations led to one of her eventual revelations. My sister and her friends never had to worry about their appearance, or so it seemed to me, so wherefore didnt they evermore determine as bold and as adroit as I felt that night? (120). In the huge run, she recognizes that people feed to catch to terms with feelings of ugliness and dishonor and that people volition al representations be envying person elses flavor. She was not bring aboutly still in her feelings of deficiency. The stress for beauty is laid on all women, and most feel they in like manner have shortcomings in attractiveness. Lucy set in motion a source of refuge from societys harm-doing in animals. She vowed to jockey her dogs and cats so extensively that it would prove her beseeming to receive that kindred sort of reach the hay. Her romantic relationship with her horses supplied her with the pinch that the characteristics that make people elegant are not always visible. The re was a complete trust that aided in the binding of their personalities. Her days spend with the horses were gormandizeed with smiles, laughter, and happiness. Performing substantially with the horses gave her a sense of self-pride and accomplishment to center her disembodied spirit around. Society made her feel too ugly for hunch forward or acceptance. The animals were not influenced by her outward appearance, that sooner by her actions, nature, and spirit: Horses incomplete disapproved or approved of what I looked like. All that counted was how I hardened them, how my actions weighted themselves in the man (152). These ideal relationships not exactly allowed her to experience the valiant, true, intense love she longed for in human companions, dear today also gave her a way of coping with her loneliness. She also came to understand the real beauty of the world, the beauty that swells beneath the climb up of every being. The grimness of her peers did not end when she became older. Groups of drunken men would hoot at! her from a distance, but taunt her one time they saw her face. The boys in High work had done the same thing, but instead would become unruffled with rejection when they saw her face. another(prenominal) incident that smothered her self-esteem happened when a stateless man, plead for money, approached her from behind. When she turned around and revealed her face, he apologized and gave her a dollar bill. These occurrences represent the intricate relationship between beauty and self-respect in our society. The improper, crude, drunken men were exactly trying to come across as tough and cool to their friends. The homeless man patently illustrates that even though he likely doesnt have a job, education, or economic status, he considers her ugliness to make her worse off than him. Her feelings of inadequacy were confirmed by societys relentless word toward her appearance. During one of her recessions in self-esteem, her friend form college, Greg, pulled her up by taking he r dancing at unfearing clubs. Being encompassed by homo finishual males gave her a blanket of tribute: No one took notice of me - I was without respect in this world.
It was easy to purify my own desire and sustain my feelings of physical worthlessness (201). She knew that none of the men there cared about her attractiveness because in their minds she was no less desirable than any other female. As each beat of the music moved through her body, she was able to let her emotions escape. During her senior year of college she met a convention of transvestites that experimented with her femininity by spreading on loa ds of makeup. These experiences helped mystify to de! fine her maidenlike appearance and acceptance from males. Lucy believed that not having a lover meant she was in conclusion unlovable, and too ugly to ever compass a lover. ride was her salvation. If only I could get someone to have sex with me, it would mean I was attractive, that someone could love me (206). Miniskirts, garter belts, uplifted heels and her dedication to her healthy, fit body allowed her to be more female as she added to her list of sexual encounters. Her matter of course that only love from another person could prove her value left her looking for love in all the wrong places. How she, as a woman, would find her place in society would not be truly revealed to her until later. Sex and fashion did not fill her void, but did play an important role in her self-definition and keenness for deal of something more definite. In our society, women are especially pressured to wear their beauty on the surface. Lucy found hers within as she authorized her obvious dis figurement. After this revelation she experienced a atomic number 42 of freedom: Id had [freedom] behind my Halloween mask all those years. As a child I expected my liberation to come from acquiring a new face put on, but now I saw it came from shedding my image (222). throughout her life she tried to overcome the teasing, the stares, the whispers, the absence of love, and the overall harshness of her peers by finding outlets for her oppressed emotions of loneliness. Although Halloween, animals, dancing, fashion expression, and sex gave her some compensation, none of these could give her complete self-assurance. She had longed to be accepted by societys standards, but came to terms with her feelings and acknowledged her true self. As her intelligence unfolded, her personality was no longer restrained by feelings of risk and need to conform to feminine standards. If you want to get a generous essay, order it on our website:
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